The Hobo Treasure Map, or Ass-Map because it looks like skinned butt cheeks (which it is), is an old map of the United States of America that shows where the great treasure of the hobos is hidden. That is if you can decipher the Hobo Code.
History[]
The map was once given from the hobo king Toothless Rufus to Armstrong during the Great Depression. Rufus held Armstrong to be worthy enough as Armstrong had never pursued a luxurious life.
Soon thereafter the map was split into "western" and "eastern" halves during a dog fight while Armstrong was partying with another group of hobos. Armstrong was capable of saving one half but the other dog got away with the "eastern" half. Later it was picked up by an unnamed man whose job was to catch wild dogs. The man later served in Vietnam, came back and started a career as hippie, then protesting against the war. When he was looking for some much needed LSD, he traded for it with his part of the map.
Next time the map showed up in a police auction where it was sold for five dollars. It was then offered for $100 in a Folk Art stall on a market, opposite to the stand of Schweitzer Farms. The farmer thought that fine piece of ass would look nice on a wall and bought it. Unfortunately, Schweitzer was working for the evil Mondostano Corporation who was looking after the map for some weird reason. Schweitzer and his dead found themselves murdered by Jia Storm and Mister Meat.
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